Woman, Behold Thy Son

On April 14, 2006--Good Friday I had the opportunity to preach one of the Seven Last Words of Jesus (The Third Word). The service was held at Bonnieview Christian Church in Dallas, Texas. I must admit, I was a bit intimidated being the ONLY woman preaching, but I was thankful and blessed by the opportunity to share my particular perspective. Please feel free to share your thoughts.

Introduction:
What do we call a woman who’s child is about to die? Is there a name for such a predicament? When the child dies, how will we refer to her? How will she self-identify? What word expresses her emptiness and pain? Now, we know what to call a child who’s parents have died…they are orphans. Our English language has a word that illustrates the state of being of a woman who’s husband has died…she’s a widow. And a man who’s lost his wife…is a widower. There’s even a word that reflects the damage done to a person whose personal property has been stolen…they’re called victims.

But for a mother…the one who bears the burden of nine months of weight gain, swollen legs, back aches. A mother, the one who goes through the valley of the shadow of death to bring new life into this world…when her child dies…the human language is inadequate. You see, there is no word in the English language for a woman whose child has died. There is only silence.

Mary Was Voiceless
Oh yes, she has wailed, she has moaned, and cried out in agony over the injustice meted out to her son. But now, here at the foot of the cross—she stands, only watching her oldest son hanging between the twilight of two worlds. She’s standing. Her eyes—focused on his blood-drenched tunic—the one she made for him as a special gift.
Mary is silent. Her despair is almost suffocating, she wants to say something—Just to let him know how much she loves him—but no words come out of her mouth. She only watches, as sweat like heavy drops of rain, fall from his torn and battered body.
She’s listening—she hears him as a little boy running around playing and laughing with the other children. She hears him as he gets beside himself and says, “I must be about my father’s business.” She feels the gentle kisses on her cheek, as he leaves to go teach in the marketplace. Mary is standing near the cross.

Oh my God, how is she able to stand? Oh look! She’s not standing alone. She has her sisters by her side—her own sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. At the moment of Mary’s greatest despair—and heartache, she needed women by her side. Women who understood what it meant to love and lose a child.

Mary had such high hopes for Jesus—as most mother’s do. But now, here he is hanging on the cross, his blood soaked body reminds her that this is the end of her dreams for her son. He was dying, right before her very eyes…and so were her own dreams…even so, she’s standing near the cross.

Is there something that Mary is telling us? Is there some remnant of hope to be gleaned from Mary’s plight? Maybe, just maybe we too can stand. When all hell breaks loose in our lives, when our dreams turn into nightmares…we can still stand. When we’ve been rejected we can stand. When society tries to make us believe we’re the least, the last, and the left-behind, we can still stand.

Mary is telling us, if there is any hope for maintaining our sanity, we must stand, but not just anywhere--we’ve got to stand near the cross! Because only near the cross—the foot of the cross, that we can hear a Word from the Lord!


Mary Heard A Word
Out of the silence…there was a voice. “Dear Woman, here is your son.” Finally the silence was broken…Jesus speaks from the Cross. Jesus has a Word for his mother and his friend—John—the self-proclaimed “disciple that Jesus loved.” From the cross, Jesus is giving instructions. On the cross, Jesus is pondering, planning, and preparing. He is concerned about those he loves and those that love him. In the midst of his suffering—he moves himself out of the way, and draws his mother and John into the spotlight.

What a lesson for us. Most of us, when all is well with our souls…find it difficult to take a back seat and put others first. Our agenda is the only agenda that matters…what we want is preeminent. Our pain is the only pain. We are so self-centered. But on the Cross—Jesus has compassion for the hurting—for the voiceless…for those in despair…for the grieving. Jesus calls his mother out of the shadow of the cross—Woman, here is your son.

Why did Jesus call her Woman? She was his mother…not just a Woman. In fact, the word he uses is gyne—and typically refers to a bride or wife. She wasn’t his bride or his wife—yes, she had been someone’s wife—Jospeh’s, but Joseph is not here…so why gyne? The most appropriate word would have been Meter—the word for Mother, a word that suggests a relationship. What was Jesus trying to communicate to Mary? Why did he use such an impersonal and detached word as gyne?

Listen, I believe Jesus was telling Mary, “You have got to let me go!” I can imagine Jesus telling Mary, “Don’t you remember the promise God made to you through the angel Gabriel?” “You will be with Child and give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever; his house will never end.”

Jesus wanted Mary to understand that that day was here…Jesus knew she couldn’t see it!—she was blinded by grief. Mary must have felt as though she been tricked, lied to and deceived by God…but God is not a man that lies. And so, Jesus called her Woman, because she must move on! She had spent a lot of time with Jesus. Directing much of her attention to him and his ministry, often neglecting her own needs as well as those of the other children …perhaps that was a reason none of the other children were at the cross holding up their mother.

It was now time for Mary to get on with living…Jesus was calling her to another purpose. You see, God never closes one door without opening another. There are always more opportunities to serve in God’s family. Just because one chapter of your life has ended that doesn’t mean it’s time to sit down! Just because it didn’t work out at First St. John Church of God in Christ, doesn’t mean your ministry career is over!! See what other congregations need a pastor. Investigate serving in another area of ministry…but for God’s sake…do something!! My God, there is never a dearth of ministry opportunities in the Kingdom. But sometimes we need others to direct our attention to where the needs are. Jesus was redirecting Mary to where the needs were. John needed a mother…someone to care for him, listen to him, help him in his ministry… I know John wasn’t considered family through blood lines, but he was family, through love lines. He loved Jesus, he followed him, he stayed with him to the bitter end! That’s what really matters. Mary needed another son—she needed a family that would build her up and help her to feel useful once again.

We all need to be cared for and to care for others. That is the message of the Cross…that is the reason Jesus endured such excruciating agony. Loving and caring for all God’s creation was what was most important to Jesus. So important that it was one of the last words he spoke. “Dear Woman, here is your son, and to the disciple, “Here is your mother.”